The Bloody Secret
by BadGurl
Summary: Relena has a secret. What happens when that secret doesn't want to stay a secret anymore?
1. Default Chapter Title

Gundam Wing doesn't belong 2 me in any way shape or form k? Are we clear? If not then u've just got problems that are slowly becoming issues. The guy in this book named Riuko, he looks EXACTLY like juunana-gou or #17 from DBZ ok? I also don't own Wash, Kagato, or Risika k? New: I'm going to continue the sory by going on were I left of k? With anyone's got a prb with that review got it?  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The Bloody Secret  
  
  
  
  
  
  
They all thought I was just the pathetic peace princess. That I couldn't go to the bathroom without supervision. Even him. Heero. How can you think such things. They didn't know the truth. And I'll take the truth to the grave if I have to. They never know. They _can't_ know. I won't let them know. If they did I would repeat the hell I went through so many years ago. I couldn't take them looking at me like all the others I've hurt have. Such hatred, repulsion. At the time I couldn't give less a damn. At the time _we _couldn't give less a damn. _Him_, my partner in my bloodshed and destruction. He was my partner in every way possible. My friend, my lover, my equal, my partner. Riuko was his name.  
Chin length black hair, slited eyes blue eyes, and pale complection, all deadly. We bled together, we cried together, we were created together. We believed we were created _for _eachother. Which was technically true. But to us it had a deeper meaning. Apart we were muderers. Together we were destroyers. Yet one thing about him stood out in my mind. His red bandana. He always wore it around his neck. A blood red bandana which he only took off during our love making. He said it was soaked with the blood of his victims. He never let me touch it.  
I guess I should start the story before I get into that.   
  
  
  
_Fade in  
  
  
  
_I was now 18 years old. It had been two years since the Marimeia conquest. Trowa had gone back to the circus and the rest of the gundam pilots became preventers.My own personal body guards. I needed no protection from them or anybody else. I was in school now quietly listening to my chemistry teacher. My appearence was no longer that of a fifteen year old child. I had grown tall and slim. Yet my curves had deepened quite a bit. I no longer had the wide eyed innocense of a child. Instead my eyes had tilted upwards slightly giving them a catlike look. My once waist length sandy blond hair was now past my kneese. In my growth spurt I had lost all my baby fat. My emerald eyes watch the teacher as he demonstrated a situation with rapid hand movement that annoyed me. Heh funny, had this happened three hundred years earlier I would have killed him on the spot.  
I flinch as I feel a primal pleasure sweep through my body. Involuntary images of his blood streaming down my hands, his chilling scream and cries begging me to have mercy. A sadistic smile spreading over my lips as I plung the energy beam into his neck. Laughing. I would laugh at his fear of death and Riuko would smirk and chuckle as he looked for his own victim to torcher. It was a longing. A primal longing. To destroy. To hurt. To kill both physically and emotionally. A longing that I had to fight. A fight that has been going on for one hundred years. I grab my head in attempt to push those images away and fight the disire.  
The gundam pilots have noticed. They begin to stare at me with their piercing gaze. Turn away! Stop looking at me! I clench my eyes shut. Dear god the desire had never been this strong! I wait for the damn bell to bring me to freedom. After a minute or two of waiting it finally does and I dash out of there like the hounds of war are on my heels. I make it outside and slump against the school to drain those thoughts. The pilots have soon found me. Duo reaches his hand out to touch me but I pull away. No contact. No flesh. It would only increase the desire which was turning into pain. "Hey leeny you ok?"The braided one asks.   
I hate that name. It lables innocense that I don't have. "I'm fine Duo please leave, you aren't helping."I state glaring at him. He doesn't seem to take the hint. Duo crouches to my level and stares at me. "Sorry little Leeny but Shinigami never takes no for an answer, you can ask all the dates I've had." He jokes winking at me. I stare at his neck pulse with desire. I think Heero notices, what with his enhanced senses and all, but I don't care. Duo's hand is on my neck. "You don't even know what a Shinigami is..........." I Moaned carressing his hand with my neck.   
They all stare at me in shock obviously never hearing me talk in that kind of voice. Through there shock I could tell they were aroused and curious. The bloodlust is taking over. It has never been this strong! What in the hell is going on! I slam my back against the brick wall tilting my head upwards and clenching my eyes shut. My hands make fists out of the grass around me. My breath becomes a pant to try to stop from hurting anyone. No one knows what to say to me now. They had never seen me in this state before. Only Duo seems to have the courage to get closer to me. He always was an idiot.   
The passion is taking over and I can feel myself become violent. He's so close. So very close. "Relena?" He askes in a slightly husky voice. My head snaps back down to face him. I bloodlust takes over for a minute. I snatch his braid and yank him into a short but unbearably passionate french kiss, no slow toung demanding acess, I want what I want _now. _Everybody's to shocked to do anything as I dig my nails into his neck to draw up blood. I felt his arousle press against my thigh, as he tries to kiss back, but I'm far to agressive for him to even try.   
Suddenly a voice entered my mind.'Do u have any idea what your kissing?!' My eyes shoot open as I shove him to the ground with a strength that I haven't used in eighteen years. I dash out of, jump the fence and run down the sidewalk. Sure that they're not following me I sigh and stop running and start a slight walk. I shake my head, my desire quieting and mocking me at the same time. This had only happened when I was around Riuko and then I didn't fight it so it didn't hurt. But I hadn't seen Riuko in two hundred years. Our telepathic connection had been lost when the gems were extracted from my wrists.  
He couldn't know where I am..............could he? I sigh and begin the long walk home to my mansion. I feel someone approach me. I slowly begin to power walk untill I feel a hand on my shoulder. "Take.It.Off.Or.I'll._Brake._It.Off."I growl to my intruder. I immediately know who it is. "I doubt you'd be capable of that."Heero's monotone voice stated. He's right, I would't be capable of that, just not for the reason's he's thinking.  
For the next hour or so, whatever it took for me to get to my mansion and him to walk me to my room we said nothing. When he spoke for the third time since her touched my shoulder. "Whats wrong with you?"Funny, he almost sounded concerned. "Nothing. Leave." I stated simply. "You don't put any part of your body on _that _unless god himself threatens to blow up the world." He stated referring to Duo.  
"Then I guess you can thank me for saving the world."My own voice going monotone. Heero latches on to my shoulders and glares at me in the eye. He had never experienced rebellion or coldness from me of any sort before, so I guess this must be quite the change for him. "You will tell me Relena. _That _wasn't you back there." He said his face only centimeters from my own. What I did next wouldn't have surprised me two hundred years ago, but now I almost regretted it. I kneed him in his groin, ducked and swept my leg out from under him making him fall to the ground. I have no doubt that he would've prevented me from doing so if he hadn't underestimated me so grately.  
I stood and brushed myself off. I smirked at him and the next words I said even chilled me to the bone. "I tell you this young Heero, and I will not repeat myself. _Never _underestimate me." I then walked into my room leaving him now bent over in pain as he tried to hide it. Normally I would have made myself miserable knowing I had hurt him, but I had felt pleasure in hurting him. I low chuckle escaped my lips. I was shortly lived as I heard clapping. My green eyes darted over to my large bed to where the sound was coming from. My eyes widened as I saw who it was. Riuko. My eyes narrowed and sent him a deathglare that would make satan himself cringe.  
He was still clapping and silently mocking me. I looked toward the nightstand were I kept my deadly gems in a locked safe and wondered if it was worth uniting with them just to kick his sorry ass. A deep chuckle escaped his lips as he clapped on. "So Risika I see you haven't changes much." I cringed as he called me by my real name. I hated being reminded of what I really was. I turned my head away, unable to look at the anger and betrayle in his eyes.  
"What do you want from me Riuko?" He stared at me as if contemplating what I was really asking. "You left." It was a simple statement from him. Yet it meant so much.  
  
  
  
  
_Flash back  
  
  
  
  
  
_You are in a dark lab. It looks like Dr.J's. A tall women with spikey pink hair is standing next to Riuko staring at something. It is a women in a tank filled with a blue liquid. Her long sandy blond hair flows about her and her green eyes are closed. She is were nothing but what looks like a strapless black spandex bra and a matching panty set. "How could she do this to me?"The pink haired women said. "Washu I'm sure she didn't even think of you. It was that boy that made her do this." Riuko stated with anger in his eyes. "She has no energy left. I'll have to rearange her masscells back to her childlike state for her to heal properly. I have to go back to square one." Riuko took his eyes of the beautiful girl in the tank to look at Washu. "She was my daughter damn it! Didn't that even cross her mind when she killed her self!" Washu screamed.  
"She's not your own, Washu. She's just a little weapon for our use. Don't think of her as any different." Their heads snapped toward the sound of the voice. "Leave me Kagato! You do not belong here now!"Washu screeched at him. "hmph! Trying to kill herself because her love chose another. Washu I thought They were created without feelings!"Kagato scolded. "The heart needs what it needs. It wasn't her faulnt. Don't blame her Kagato." Washu spoke in a quiet voice now. "It would be easier to led her disintergrate and creat another android." His voice had no feeling. "NO! I mean, it would be a waste. If I were to create another it would not be as strong as her." Washu hoped that would be enough of an excuse for Kagato. He simply nodded and left.  
"I have extracted the gems from her wrist so the masscells can recreate themselves.I created her with powers to protect her from any harm. So nothing could hurt her. I guess nothing could keep her from heart ache could it Riuko?" Washu turned to the male android as he looked away from his healing counter part and away from washu."I wouldn't know anything about that, Washu."He whispered. "Wouldn't you?" Washu gave him one last questiong glance before leaving him with his partner.  
Riuko stared at his beautiful equal. His own reflection staring back at him. He placed his hand on the glace were her hand was floating. "Why Sika-chan? How could you not even think of me when you took the own beam to your neck? I'll protect you Risika. You said you would stay by my side as long as I needed you." He watched as her body detearierated back down to a child's body. A lone tear swept across his cheek as he stayed by her side.  
  
  
  
_End Flashback  
  
  
  
_"I see you've also taken another name. Relena. Wasn't that the name of the bitch that stole your love away?" Riuko questioned. I stared at the ground with my fists clenched at my side. How dare he mention him! "Please Riuko, you've never hurt me before don't start now." A Silence passed over the room and I finaly gained the courage to look at him. He was laying crosslegged on my bed with his hand behind his hand and staring at me. I stare back. Once we were so comfortable with eachother it seemed as if we were one body. I think he feels it too.  
He turnes his gaze away and begins to through two small objects up and down in his hand. I squint my eyes to see what they are. MY GEMS! I rush to my nightstand praying to prove my thoughts wrong. "It would be useless to look. I took them."He said his voice emotionless. Just like it was before he killed his victim. Still I had no fear of him. "Give them here." I demanded. He lazily lifted his gaze to me. That just got me angry. "Gems or no gems I can still kick your happy ass from here to timbuckto and I demand _respect!!"_ I now had his bandana in my hand and yanked his face upward toward mine.  
Riuko seemed a bit surprised at first but he stopped underestimating me. "Other thatn a tad bit more formal you haven't really changed." He said with a smirk. I released his bandana and observed him for any changes to his appearence that he had made. He wore a black tanktop with dark navy,slightly baggy, jeans. I smirked as I caught site of his ear. He still wore a little gold earing in it. Riuko looked like a normal badass teen. Who'd of thought that we were the ones responsible for the destruction of the first space colony.  
"Why did you leave?" It was a simple question, but the answer was the reason I'm the way I am today. "It wasn't my fauln't and you now it!"  
  
  
  
_Flash back  
  
  
_Sodiers from the Sanq Kingdom invaded the lab destroying everything in sight.The lab has fire to it. The girl that was once in the tank is now a baby in the tank. Washu, Kagato, or Riuko are in sight. A metal beam fall on to the tank smashing it. The baby falls out but doesn't cry. A soldier runs to her and picks her up as he carries her out. He runs to the top of the hill and watches the destruction of the lab from above. He glances down at the child in his arms. "Experimenting on babies! Have they no shame." The child continues to stare at the burning lab. The fire reflects in her eyes. The soldier gently tickles her under her chin and smiles. This gains her attention and she giggles as she latches onto his fingure. "So little one what is your name?" He asked not expecting an answer. The baby stops playing with his finger and stares at him.   
Name? What was a name? She didn't rember anything. A word suddenly came to her mid. "Relena!" She squealed in delight. The soldier gasped and stared at her as she continued to repat the name over and over again like a mantra. "You beling in the palace with her highness, I'm sure the queen of the Sanq Kingdom will take you in." He smiled warmly as the child just stared at him slightly confused. He got up and made his way to a helecopter to go to the sanq Kingdom. As the helecopter flies away the baby stares down at her burning home. The fire still reflecting in her eyes.  
  
  
  
  
_End Flash back  
  
  
  
_"I didn't gain back my memories untill I was thirteen. Those people tought me feelings, and I had killed innocent people just like them. Its my time for redemption Riuko." I stated. He simply scoffed at me. "Redemption? How do intend to make up for two hundred years of destruction in just a few years?" He tilted his head to the side in mockery. "I have eternity to make up for..........." I trailed off realizing what he was saying. I couldn't age. What would happen when they saw that their seventy year old princess looked like a eighteen year old young woman. I only had untill I was thirty maybe forty untill they would become suspicious. That damn chuckle of his started up again.  
"Why do you need redemption anyway? Your not going to die so your not going anywhere? And say you do get this so called redemption of yours? What will you do next? Give in to the hunger I know you feel now?" The damned bastard was mocking me. He couldn't be right! He just couldn't! "You will never stand before god for your judgment so whats the point?" What was the point. "I don't want to hurt people any more." I whispered. "I felt hurt just like them Riuko!! I felt my heart litteraly shartter in two when Cusho chose Relena over me!! It was like every thing I have ever done ment nothing anymore!! Thats why I chose to take her name! The last thing I would ever steal from anybody! She was perfect , She was everything I wanted to be! So I chose her for my redemption." I whispered the last part.  
"How can you still love him after he tried to kill you?" "Was just avenging his beloved."I whispered . "Ah yes you killed her and her little brat child didn't you?" "It was an accident. I was just trying to protect them." "I believe you tried to tell him the same thing after he attacked you." I said nothing. "He lived loving you as a friend and died hating you as the devil." He was right. I turned my head away. "Just tell me what you want and get on with it."I demanded. "I want many things Sika-chan, I want my partner back, I want you to forget about Cusho, but if you want the reason I am here it is because I need your help." I burst out laughing as he said that.  
"My help!_You _need _my_ help! You haver never swollowed your pride enough to ask _anyone _for help, why now?" He glared at me but continued his explanation. "Kagato has taken over. You've been gone to long. He has buitl some sort of device that controls the gems in our wrists-" "The gems in _your _wrists." I corrected. "Fine the gems in _my _wrists. Washu doesn't have the power to stop him and I can't do this alone. I was designed with enhanced strength to hold soldiers off while you did the technical stuff. So basically the broze needs his brains back." He said simply. "Your asking me to unite with the gems aren't you?" I don't know why I asked, I already knew the answer.   
Riuko nodded and tossed the gems to me. I snorted and let them drop to the floor. "_Well_?" He was getting annoyed I could tell. "Number one: If I put those gems back Kagato will be able to control and you aren't even _positive _that both of us together can stop him. Number two: I won't let the people I love find out about this. I'm happy and refuse to take such a stupid risk." I narrowed my eyes at him. He layed there and smirked at me. "I do believe you're leaving one part out of that little speech Sika-chan." I snorted. "And that would be....." "What they would do once they found out." I raised an eyebrow at the bluntness of the statement. "How could anyone love someone, ahem excuse me, some_thing _that is responsible for killing so many innocense? And that scares you." I rolled my eyes at him in fake scoff. "Doesn't it suck being wrong all the time Riu?"I asked."I wouldn't know. But in this case I'm not wrong."  
I knew he was right but I'd burn in hell before I'd stroke that ego of his. "What do you need from me?" "I don't know yet, I don't have enough info on the problem at hand yet, why? Are you going to do it?" He asked slyly. "Why the hell should I?" I noticed his face had softened some what. "I miss knowing what your feeling Sika-chan. I miss being able to hear you in my head comforting be during battle. I miss being one with you. And I know you miss it too. It feels lonely, like you gone blind yet you can see perfectly." So he did still care. I suppose some things can't change.  
I nodded my head. It was true. I missed never being alone. Never second guessing yourself, because you knew your other half was going through it too. Riuko got off the bed and started toward me. He bent down and picked up the gems. When he stood up he handed them to me. "I will get my partner back Risika, one way or another." He stated as he turned around and started toward the window. "Don't make threats you can't back up Riu." He had one foot on the window sil preparing to go out the way he came. He turned toward me and with just a few words he threatened my life without even touching me. "If you don't show them what you are. I'll tell them myself." My eyes widened in shock, knowing that he would back that threat up.  
"NO! Please Riu! You can't do this! I know you can't! Don't tell them I can't handle going through the past all over again." I pleaded. His ice blue eyes stared into my emerald ones. At that moment I could see everything. His torture, his pain, his longing for me to come home, his love, but most importantly. I saw myself. I didn't even need our connection anymore. Suddenly his hand shot out and wrapped itself around the back of my head and brout me within millimeters of his own face. "I give you time Risika.She ador mi Gatito pequeno." With that he kissed me and left the way he had came.  
What he had said was a mixture of spanish and french. I didn't even knew he knew those languages. What was I going to do. I looked at the gems in my hand. They glowed with excitment, pleading to go back into their misstress once more. If I did this it would be the end of my redemption. I could barely fight the blood thirst now let alond with the power inside me. I would go back to being a killer. A tiger stalking thw world as its prey. I would see through my eyes once more. I remember it though. I saw everything especially humans as incignificants. Little toys that I like to play with.  
I balled the gems into my fist and clenched my eyes shut. I held my past in my hands. I held blood in my hands. I could destroy this world and I propbably would. '_How can you pay for redemption Risika?' There's so mcuh blood. The price is so high......' _My eyes shot open and I dropped the gems. Riuko's voice. I had heard it. Very faintly put It was there. The gems made contact with me that muct be why. What he said got to me. _The price is so high. _A single tear travled down my cheek. How could I go to heaven if so many people hated me there? Does god himself hate me? What is my price? I collapsed to my kneese not knowing what to do. This would be my last night seen as a human and not a monster. Either way the people I love would see the monster rear its ugly head. Is that my price?  
  
  
  
  
  
_'The price is so high'  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
2bc  
  
Ok first I gotta make my thank u list because I would be the ultrab*tch if I didn't.  
1:Thanks yardat sama I know its sorta wierd but it just popped into my head.  
2: thank u : ) I love that review and I got the next chap so its not necessary 2 send me the virus, but I gotta few Flamer fans I know u could send it to.  
3:Thanks Asn Princess yeah u were right Riuko was on the bed . Cool call on your part!  
4:Mandy thanks for the review I'm glad u think u like my story I hope u like this chap.  
5:Thanks Frost for the original comment I think so to! : )  
6:I'm soo honored that u like this story Mika Maxwell! You are one of my fave authors!  
7: Thanks Shinigami's tenshi that was sweet.  
8: Rei Tamishii This chap is your u hope u like it : )  
9: Don't worry Meiun I didn't leave u hangging! Although I think I could have done better on this chap.  
10:__MIRGONUS CONGRATULATIONS U HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLLERS!! __Well not really but I hope another chapter is just as good.  
11:Nooknak: I know! why don't people make relena strong in any of there stories?  
12: Don't Ask: I didn't mean for her 2 kick Heero's butt as bad as she did but it came out pretty cool don't ya think!  
13: I'm not THAT much of an evil author Little mew2. I'm probably and evil sadistic b*tch in person though. Not really, thats just what Ally calls me and she's just mad because I threatened a little kid at daycare who was hitting my little brother.  
_


	2. Default Chapter Title

Lets make a list of things I don't own shall we?  
1:Gundam Wing  
2: Kagato  
3: Washu  
4: Risika  
5:Tenchi Muyo  
6: DBZ  
7: A convertable  
8: the presidensy  
9: Florida  
10: All the money in the world  
11: ect.  
  
  
  
  
  
_ The Bloody Secret_  
  
I stared in horror realizing what he was trying to do. "Heero get the hell outta the way!!" I screeched. Those weren't Riuko's moves. I ran toward them as fast I could praying I got there it time! 'Riouko' grabbed Quatra by the neck and slamed him against the wall. "Aaaauuuuugggghhh!!!" Quatra screamed as evergy sparks shot out his neck. "Kagato Stop! The boy did nothing to you!!" He faced me and stared at me as a sadistic grin broke over his face. A low chuckle escaped him." So the little kitten finally figured it out?" 'Riuko' growled. Suddenly Kagato's appearence took its body back. Huh? How did he do this? I look to his wrist and notice a small bracelet like contraption where the image came from. He noticed my gaze. "Hmph! A brilliant device really. It is able to take a bodily image and project it in the third dimention around the body of the holder." Well that solves the mystery and the mystery of why he fell on his ass.  
Wait. Kagato didn't have lasers....I took a closer look at his other hand and noticed a small round object. My gems! How the hell did he get those! "Let him go Kagato!" I snarled. "You know the saying machine. An eye for an eye." He said holding one of my gems up in his good hand. I flinched. I hated it when he called me a machine. "How did you get those! Were's Riuko!" "You are not in any position to make demands of me Risika." He didn't raise his voice to me _once._ I now know what it is to look into the face of Satan himself. "I won't go back Kagato." He smirked. "I think you will." He increased his grip on Quatra's throat causing more screams of pain. "What the hell is he talking about Relena!" "What does he want!" "Why is he after you!" The pilots all shouted at me at once.  
The shouting was making my eyes clench shut and my hands ball into fists. No no no no no no no. Please god I know my price is high but please don't make this it. "Relena." I recognized the monotone voice and opened my eyes. Only to be met with a fist. I looked up at Heero from my position on the ground holding my cheek. He hit me. He hit me. He hit me. "Give him what he wants Relena." His eyes held no feeling. "You have no idea what he wants." I stated in mere awe. Congratulations Perfect soldier. You may now say Mission completed.  
I stand up. My back straight as a bar and my fists at my side. My eyes once again held no feeling as I walked toward my new master and the dying Quatra. Its time now. Its time to go back to hell. Everyone watches. Yet no one stops me. I can hear the far away voice of my Riu-chan begging me to stop. But its too late. My reservation in hell had been long since made. I hold my wrists out to Kagato as he clutches them with the gems still in his hands. Its feels like he has poured acid through my body! Oh god nothing had ever hurt this much! A tear streams down my cheek. Not for the pain but the conclusion of reality I have finally come to recognized. I am alone. I am a grain of sand amongst a huge black void.  
I hear Riuko scream my name. Heh he's finally here. He is the only one who has never betrayed me. Such a loyal friend. My beautiful friend. You will have your partner back. Flash back of us come to my mind.  
  
  
  
  
_Flash back  
  
  
_Riuko is sitting on a window sill in the lab with his back against the border and his left leg on the sill. We have just destroyed an orphanage at a colony. Children. That was what hit home for him. I don't dare go near him. "Why are you not repulsed by me my beautiful?" His words surprise me but I quickly regain my composure. " Why would I?" He looks toward his hands after a few moments he violently whips his head away from them and towards the window. "I'm a monster. My hands are covered with blood that will last as long as we do." His face draws into a scowl. Is that what you think my precious? I walk over to the sill and sit opposite of him. I take his hand in my own and caress it. After a minute or two I break the silence. "I don't see anything." He stares at me for a while and I bring his head to rest on my chest.  
"Never leave me Sika-chan."He whispers. "I'll stay by your side for as long as you need me." "Then you'll be here forever."He whispers in my ear. "You'd be surprised at how short forever really is. Nothing else was said.  
  
  
  
_End flash back  
  
  
  
_ I collapse to the ground when the process is over. I refuse to open my eyes and see the monster I have once again become. I don't have to look at the Gundam Pilots to see the repulsion in there eyes that I know is there. "Open your eyes Sika-chan." I hear a voice that is not Kagato's. My eyes reluctantly open. I stare into endless pools of ice. "Riuko?" He nodds and takes me into his arms. I feel nothing. Its over. Its all over. I have nothing left to lose. A sudden rage takes over my body. I want to kill. I want to feel blood drip through my hands. How satisfying. A grin brakes over my face. A grin I haven't used in one hundred years. Hmm I think its time to make up for lost time.  
I leap up and survey the residents around me. I spot Heero. Sweet Heero. Do you have any Idea how much you've hurt me? Its time to pay you back. I charge at him, laser blade ready and waiting for the kill. He doesn't move. Hm how quaint for the Perfect Soldier to never run. "IT'S TIME TO DIE!!!" I screech as I prepare to impale him with my laser sword. He dodges, but this just intrigues me. I leap and counter all his dodges all the while slicing my sword around him. I manage to slice his arm and rib. The sight of the blood makes me stop.  
Its beautiful. Such a deep shade of red. It spills over its sire wound and coats its master red. I lick my lips and chuckle at my work. I want to see his eyes when I kill him. I tackle him to the ground. How funny, he doesn't even put up a fight. Whats wrong sweet soldier? To afraid to hit a girl? No matter. I'm straddling his hips while I have pinned his shoulders to the ground. I creat and energy blade and bring it to his neck. There's no fear in his eyes. Just like a warrior should be. I do notice something in his eyes though. Over the years I've grown quite perseptive. There's love. But he's afraid of it? I chuckle as I realize this.  
He loved me. He ruined me. A poem comes to mind.' Love me. break me. hit me. hate me.' How true. I bring the blad closer to his neck and lean down to whisper something in his ear. "How does it feel to be killed by the one you love Precious Soldier? Hurts doesn't it? I speak from personal experience." A chuckle passes my lips as I'm ready to slice his throat. "Aaaaggghhhh!!!!" I scream and clutch my wrist. My gem glows a vicious red as it coats me with pain. I look over and see Kagato pressing some button on a small control.  
"Come Risika. Stop wasting time." He speaks as if he's a robot. Kagato presses the button again and once more I'm filled with an unbearable pain. I raise myself and get up as I walk toward my new master and my new hell. Riuko sends me an apologetic glance. "Lets go." I nodd and begin my way back to the familiar base. I know Riuko's behind me with Kagato but I know longer care. _'I'm sorry' 'Why? didn't you get what you want Riu?' 'I'd never hurt you, you know that!' 'Hmph! Yeah sure.' 'Sika-chan please' 'Don't you dare!' '(sigh) Don't leave me again Sika-chan. Some one always takes you away from me.Cusho.Heero. Please I can't take this.' _I say no more. He's been suffering just as I have. God I've missed him. Riuko was right. Its like going blind yet seeing perfectly. Then why am I still blind?  
After a few hours we reach the newly rebuilt lab. We walk in after passing thousands of security sheilds. I notice a woman with spikey pink hair standing with her back facing us. She's obviously working on something. "Washu I have retrieved her." What? Why does he speak like that?Washu whips around and__eyes meet mine. She says nothing as she staggers toward me. "My baby? Oh my precious duaghter!" She embraces me and practically squeezes the life out of me. I manage to sneak out of her embrace and walk over to stand by Riuko. "Whats wrong Risika? What happened?" I stare at her for a while before answering. "Life" with that I walk toward my room.  
I survey my sancturay from the storm with amusement. Its just the way I left it. The room was entirely black and red. The room itself was enormous complete with conopy bed and all. I walk to my bed and notice my work suit on it(read chap 2 to know what it looks like.) I quickly change back into it and look myself over in the mirror. My arms wrap around my body trying to comfort myself. But I find I don't need to since a pair of arms had already wound themselves around my curvey waist. "You look beautiful." Riuko whispers in my ear."Then why do I feel so ugly?" He stares at my reflection for a while before picking me up baby style and carrying me to the bed.  
He stops when he is right infront of it and puts his hand under my shirt. "Raise your arms please." I do as he askes and let him take off my shirt along with the rest of my clothes. There's no blushing. We know eathother to well to stoop to cheap blushing. He strips untill he's down to his black boxers. Riuko once again picks me up and tucks me into my bed. I watch him as he lifts the covers and climbs in hiself. My Riu-chan then tucks me in his arms. Thats all that happens, I know he would never take adavantage of the state I am in now. I've never had to be protected in my entire three hundred years of existence. But in this moment I don't think I could live without it.  
We are not able to sleep. I am not able to talk. So instead he speaks to me. Riuko's ice eyes stare into my soul as he whispers his words to me. "I looked every where for you when you left. I first tried Lake Mayumi. I had expected you to be there." I close my eyes so he won't be able to see the pain in them, but I know that our connection lets him feel it instead. "Why would I go there." "To pay your respects." "Cusho doesn't wants my repects." "You don't know that." I suddenly become angry. "I promised him I would never bother him again and I'm going to keep that promis!" Riuko stares at me for a while. Nothing else is said. I have nothing of that place anymore. All I have are my memories. And so I will remember.  
  
  
  
  
_Flash back  
  
  
  
_I was out stalking again. I had lost Riuko in the woods some where, but I'm not concerned. The humans have developed something called a mobile suit now. They are a bit hard to beat. Especially if they catch us. At the moment I'm stalking another soldier. For some odd reason this one interests me. He has shoulder length brown hair and golden eyes. Hm how exotic. I squat on a tree limb and watch him walk. He seems to sense some one watching him. I become more alert and prepare to leap onto him. Suddenly he brakes into a mad dash! Shit he must've seen me! I leap every two branches trying my best to catch up to him, but all these stupid leaves obscure my view! Just then I catch site of him. And unfortunately the enormous machine he has just jumped into.  
"It's a mobile suit!" Crap he must have heard of me from one of the stupid old men who like to tell tales about about us to scare their grandchildren. It doesn't matter now. I leap skyward off my branch and creat a power ball. Once I am level with him I blast. I managed to take his arm off but he keeps firing at me! I am growing tired as I dodge all of his attacks. I make a last attempt and creat an energy blade. I raise my arms about to stike him......................Its all over. The mechanical arm has sliced through my hip and I feel myself falling.  
Damn! how could I have been foolish enough to leave an opening for his attack! My mind is going unconcious as I pumet into Lake Mayumi. I welcome the darkness that has become so much apart of me.  
  
  
  
"Uhhggg..." My entire body hurts like hell. I feel warm water running on my forehead. Huh! What the hell! I'm alive! My eyes shoot open to find myself staring into endless pools of gold. "Aarrrgghh!!!" I yank myself up and pin him too the wall as I bring a laser blade to his neck. "Hey! Hey calm down! I just saved your life!" "Yeah and you also shot me out of the sky!" "Yeah well you were attacking me!" I growl at him and bring the blade closer. As much as I hate it he is right. And I must always pay my debts. I take a step back and bow to him. "Thank you." Funny how foreign those words sound on my toung.   
I did not kill him so there for my debt is paid. I begin toward the exit when I hear his voice call out to me. "Hey! Your not going out there are you? You'll freeze to death!" I look and notice it has begun snowing. I can survive the cold, but it does get uncomfortable."Look you can stay here for a while. No one would mind." His eyes held concern. Concern for me? "Wh-why are you being so kind to me? I can promis to help you but other than that I have nothing else to offer." He shook his head at me. "I don't want anything. I just don't want you to catch your death of cold."  
I cock my head to the side, not understanding why he was doing this. No one has _ever _been kind to me. No one wants to befriend the monster. But then again I don't want any friends. "Suppose I could. It is a tad late." He smiles at me and I am once again taken back. That wasn't a sadistic smile that only Riuko and I give. It showed no cruelty what so ever. I let him drag me to my room for the night. We reach the door and he opens it for me. "Oh by the way, my names Cusho whats yours?" He sticks his hand out as he says this. Whats he want a tip? "ummm sorry I don't have any money for you." He laughes and shakes his head at me. "Man, You really are a foreigner aren't you? Here, give me your hand." I do as he says and place my hand in his.  
I awe at how small and frail my hand seems in his. The hand that has drowned itself in blood. Cusho begins to shake it up and down slowly and I follow in suit, understanding what he wants."So whats your name?" I look at him with my green cat like eyes. I had no name. I begin to think of what an old man called me right before I killed him. "I have no name. But some one once called me Risika, is that all right?" He smiles warmly at me and I find myself smiling back. "Its just fine." He then leaves and I walk into my room.  
Its small, with a nightstand, a sleeping bag and a T.v. I'm tired so the sleepingbag seems most appealing to me. I strip and crawl into the navy sleeping back. My eyes seem heavy and I find myself closing them in an alert sleeplike state. Alway alert. Hmm Cusho is it? (Chuckle) I will stay.  
I wake up to the smell of a food that I've never heard of. I look at my clothes to get dressed but notice that they're still soaked with the exception of my bra and underwear. I simply put on what is available at the moment. I trott down stairs like a happy puppy. Table is littered with bacon, eggs, toast, waffles, pancakes, and other goodies. I immedieately dig in, not waiting or caring of anybody else. I notice Cusho staring at me. There's a stream of blood coming from his nose. Did someone hit him? "Cusho you ok?" I walk towards him but notice the closer I get the more blood spurts out his nose.  
He turns away from me and his face has seemed to turn the most awful shade of red. "Whats your problem!" He blushes even more when he answers me. "Risika.....you're down here half naked." I look over my body and find no marks. "I don't have any scares. Whats wrong with it?" I get closer curious as to know why he doesn't like me anymore. "Nothings wrong with your body! You just don't wear _that. _You have to wear clothes over it!" I cock my head to the side puzzled. "Why?" "Becauseitmakesguyslikemeveryuncomfortablesowillyoupleaseputsomeclotheson!" I didn't catch all of what he said. Something like my body makes guys uncomfortable. But I go to change anyway.   
I manage to find a black and red kimono that he has left me on the bed. I quickly change into it and make my way down stares. Cusho seems relieved but he still won't make eye contact with me. I sigh and eat whats on my plate any way. We talk and find much about eachother. I know his parents died in a plane crash and left him with his grandparents. They passed on a couple of years ago leaving him this large house in the woods right next to lake Mayumi. He knows a little about me, like what I am, Riuko, Washu and such like that. I didn't really want to talk about it.  
He offered to let me stay here untill I find my own place. I have excepted. I can only pray Riuko doesn't find me.  
  
  
  
  
  
two years later  
  
  
  
  
I have lived with my beloved Cusho for two years now. I have never been happier in my entire life! He smiles at me and tells me stories! Riuko has stopped comunicating with me a year ago and has promised not to tell Washu and Kagato where I am. Kagato couldn't care less but Washu is a different story. Cusho is coming home now, I think I'll walk him the rest of the way. I keep my kimono on and leap from branch to brach following his tracking. I finally find him but he's not alone. He's with a girl. Cusho is talking to her and holding her hand."C-Cusho? Whats going on?" I look from him to the girl. "Hey! Risika! I'm glad your here! Risika meet Relena." Relena had big brown eyes and waist length black hair. Hmph how plain! What does he see in this creature? She glares at me and holds Cusho's hand tighter.  
I send her my own glare and walk over to Cusho. "I just thought I'd walk you home Cusho!" I chirped.He looks at me with the same smile. "That won't be necessary. Relena was keeping great company." Ouch! I walked home with them anyway. I learned about this girl also. She was the Prime Minister of Spain's Daughter. The spanish princess. She was perfect in every way possible. Perfect posture. Calm quiet. Total Pacifist.And Cusho was eating it up.But she'd never have him! I had seen him first! Cusho loves me! He has too..........  
  
  
  
It has been a year since the princess has lived with us. I stay out of her way and try not to start fights with her. For some reason Cusho was depressed today so I went into town to be him a present. And I didn't steal it either! It a china doll. And a beautiful one might I add. I had saved up for months to buy it for him. I didn't know if male and females had different tastes in toys, but if I loved it then Cusho must at least like it. I run up the stares to his room to surprise him. I slam the door open in all the excitement. "Cu-chan look! I got you a gif-" The precious China doll that I had saved for shatters to the ground.They are kissing. Relena and my Cu-chan. He doesn't love me. HE DOESN'T LOVE ME!!!!  
They stare at me. To afraid to move. They look at me like I'm a deer ready to run. I clutch the door frame for support as tears run down my face. I clutch my chest as if it would stop my heart from shattering like the doll. "Risi-" He doesn't have a chance to explain as I bolt out the door and toward the stares. I know they follow me but I don't care. I don't want to hear his explanation of why he loves her and not me. I must have tripped bucause next thing I know I'm falling down the stares. I stagger up and sprint out the door, not caring for my bloody nose or the blood dripping from my forehead.  
They chase me still, untill I finally lose them in the forest. I lay on the ground for hours, through the rain and wind. I can hear a voice whispering in my head, one that is not Riuko's. 'Kill them' "no" 'Why?' "....." 'They hurt you.' "People het hurt" 'But your not a person. Your the great Risika, killer of all who dare' "I won't kill cusho" 'They hurt you so bad' "....." 'It would take the pain away'   
Would it? Yes I am Risika. I have no feelings. I make my way back to the house and to his room. Bothe of them are there. She sleeps with him. He holds her. No one has ever held me. The moonlight makes him look like the greek gods I've read about. No! I can't think that now. I creat a laser blade and raise it above my head to strike them down. Images of him helping me. him making me laugh. Him making me smile, dance through my head. 'Kill them' THe laser blade dissapears. 'Kill them. She made him stop loveing you' He never stopped loving me. He just love her more. I look at Relena. "You were a good challenge my rival." With that I leap out the window and the voice haunts me no more.   
  
  
  
  
  
It has been three years since I've last seen my precious Cusho. I have gone back to Riuko and we began our assignments once more. There is a war going on and a leader is paying Kagato a great amount to let us fight on his side. We race to the battle and I notice a familiar path. I shrug it off and continue to fight. They are using mobile suits so it has made it harder. But not by much. A mobil suit shoots at me and I dodge it. That is untill I notice a familiar looking house. CUSHO'S HOUSE! I race infront of of the beam and send one of my own. I've wasted most of my enegy deflecting it but it was worth it. I leap into the house and search for Cusho. "Cusho!!!"  
Instead Relena comes running down the stairs with a baby in her arms. They have a family now...I shake it off. "C'mon we have to get out of here!!" I grab her arm and drag her out just as another beam hits the house and destroys it. "Stay here I gotta help." I try to lead them away. After hours of fighting it is starting to die down. Now only one mobile suit stands. Riuko is off making sure the enemy is retreating. I get cocky and beging to play with the mobile suit. "Is that the best you can do!!!" I taunt him and make him shoot at me as I dodge all of his attacks. One attack was too close and it destroyed a part of the forest.  
I glare at the suit and finally destroy it. I laugh and walk around to find Relena and her baby. "HEy Princes where are you?!" I call to her. But when I finally find her I wish I hadn't. She's laying there covered in blood with her dead baby still tucked away in her arms. "No.." I race toward her and kneel as I pick her up. Her blood coats my body and I know she is dead. I bend my head down and begin to sob. "Relena?" please don't be Cusho please don't be Cusho please don't be Cusho. My prayers aren't answered.  
He stands there in his battle gear with a look of utter devestation on his face. "How could you...?" I then realize what this must look like to him. "Cusho no!" He walkes over and rips Relena out of my hands and begins to sob himself. I stand up and back away, unable to take this devestating scene. He looks up at me with pure rage and hate. "You worthless bitch!!" He screams me and and begins to try and strike me with his sword.   
"Cusho Please listen!" "THey're right! You're nothing but a heartless monster!" I can't stand to hear these words from him. I jump to him and embrace him. "Ugghhhnnnnn" I feel the pain of the sword through my stomach. I let him go and clutch my stomach as I back away. I give him one last look as I dash away from him forever.  
It is night and I lay on the ground curled up in a ball clutching my stomach still. I don't let myself regenerate. I'd rather die then live with Cusho hating me. Suddenly I see Riuko leap down from a branch infront of me. "Risika?" "leave me." I have nothing to say to him. "Regenerate Risika." He demands. "No" "DO IT!" "Let me die" "Never." He grabbed my gemed wrists and a forceful pain flooded through me. I could feel my wound healing . "Stop" He wouldn't listen to me. When the job was done he gave me one last look and left me alone. My wound was gone and so was my heart.  
I am a killer. I was created a killer and I'll go out a killer. I leaped to my feet and ran toward the Mayumi lake. But when I got there I saw something that destroyed me and the monster I shared my body with.  
"God, please......no...."   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_Ok people THAT chapter took alot out of me! I had a HUGE case of writers block that was giving me the mother ship of all headaches, so be patient for the next chapter. Oh yeah did you know I got ten emails about finishing my story?! Thanks you sooo much I love it when people email me. I'll put the thank u list up with the next chapter I'm just too tired to do it now._  
  
  
  
  



	3. Default Chapter Title

I hate writing the copywrite i hate writing the copy write i hate writing the copy write i hate righting the copywrite I HATE WRITING THE COPYWRITE! Its sooo annoying! N.E. wayz I don't want a lawsuit so people this may come as a shock 2 u but I don't own gundam wing, kagato, washu, or risika!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_The Bloody Secret_  
  
  
  
  
  
Cusho lie there with his wrists sliced open. An eternity of blood surrounded him in a circle of death. In some morbid subconcious of mine this was beautiful. He looked so peacefull and the crimson framed his body like a death cloud. A wave of nausea passes over me and I run to through the remains of my non-existing lunch in a tree. I walk back over too him in mere shock. Finally the pure pain of what has just happend hits me like a freight train. My kneese give way as I collapse and clutch Cusho to my breast. His once beautiful eyes of gold were now hidden from the world forever.  
It hurt worse knowing he died hating me. It hurt worse knowing I never had a chance. It hurt worse knowing he didn't love me. I look at his beautiful face. My precious warrior. My love, my soul, my heart. You tamed the heartless monster that I share my body with. Now it is set free once more, but even it mourns your death. So we shall mourn together the monster and I. No. You shouldn't be found like this. You shouldn't have one of those normal funerals that humans find so damned important. I take you in my arms and leap from branch to branch. I should take him to the forest, that is were he saved me. NO! You died hating me. You shouldn't be barried in a place I'm sure you find so vile now.  
I take your souless body to lake Mayumi. The place where you first met your beloved Relena. She made you happy when I could not. She was pure. I was a monster. She was innocent. I was drowned in the blood of others. She was a princess. I was a barbarien. She was your love. I was not.............A sob racks my body as I know I am forced to let you go. The water chills my body as I dive into it. When I am half way to the bottom I look at your face. Your beautiful face that once held so many smiles. Tears drown me more than the water surrounding me does. I let you go and watch you as you fall into the abiss to once again join your beloved. And she is not me.  
I propell myself out of the water and leap to the highest tree branch to survey Lake Mayumi. "Don't worry Cusho. I will never violate your resting place with my bloody hands. I will never bother you again." With that I run away from that cursed place with the promise of no return. After hours of mindlessly wondering I find myself over looking the ocean. What was I going to do? I didn't want to go back. I didn't want to go back to the hidious monster Cusho so hated. I feel a presence behind me and whirl around. It is a fawn. One that has just found its spots. The young deer wanders up to me unafraid. Its ears twitch as it sniffs and licks my hand. Does it taste the blood that I know is there.  
I create an energy sword in my good hand. I want to kill something beautiful. I raise my arms, both hands clutching the sword as I look the newly born deer in the eyes. With a great force my weapon down and plunge it into the heart! But it wasn't the deer's. I stagger back still clutching the sword in my chest. The pain is almost unbearable. The fawn follows my staggers with worry in its eyes. I turn away from it and look out into the ocean. A smile passes my face as I step of the ledge of the cliff. Falling. Thats all I feel. And yet I'm happy. The last thing I see is the fawn looking down at me with pain in its eyes.  
I see it follow my movements and walk off the ledge. At least my last moments on this earth wont be alone. I'm so sorry Riuko.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_End Flash back  
  
  
  
  
_When I awake Riuko is gone. "Riuko?" I clutch the covers to my naked body and look around. He's no where to be seen. I get up and get back into my work gear.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_At Relena's/Risika's Mansion  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The words of the great Zechs Marquis could be heard all the way in Hawaii. "Just what we told you. A man named Kagato called her an android and left with her." The monotone voice belonging to Heero. "Psst Duo, get the sedative."Noin whispered. Duo nodded and went off to get some sedative and prozac. "So you're telling me my sister is the killer of trillions of people on colonies and earth!" Each of the gundam pilots nodded. She was a killer. That was all he could think of.  
She would destroy the newly built Sanqu Kingdom if he let her. "Kill her." He whispered. "WHAT!"you can bet that screech was from Duo. "If she lives She'll destroy the Sanqu Kingdom and the Peace we've worked so hard for." HE turned away as he said this. "If you're willing to kill your own sister then your no better than her!" Duo was ready to kill ths guy. "Mission accepted." Duo turned toward Heero."WHAAATT!!" Heero responded by walking out. The rest of the gundam pilots soon followed.  
  
  
  
  
_Outside the window of the office which they were in.  
  
  
  
  
_So thats the way he wants it. My own brother has betrayed me. My own brother thinks I'm a monster. I clench my eyes shut and my fists shake at my side as I balance myself on the sill. "You have no brother so I don't know why you're worried." I open my eyes and find Riuko floating laying down with his legs crossed and his hands behind his head. "Leave me Riuko!" "Why?" I have no answer. I jump and begin floating over to the top of the building. Washu designed the gems as the gundams. Using the power source which enables them to shoot lasers and the device with enables them to levetate.  
Riuko stands infront of me and stares down at me from my sitting position. "I don't understand why you're all worked up." "you wouldn't" "That never used to be the case." "Riu don't-" "Why?" "Things can't go back to the way they were." "Why?" "I've changed." "Why?" "I couldn't help it." "It was Cusho wasn't it." "He was the start. He changed the way I see things." "He made you blind. But now that you see with your eyes open you know that you were right all along." I saw nothing. "Everyone has betrayed you Sika-chan. Your new sight has only hurt you. Now its time to go back to the way things were." Is he right? was I blind all along?  
I nod and levetate to my feet. I don't like flying at all, it wastes far to much energy. We make our way home and begin to train for the fight.  
  
  
  
  
  
Hours later I find myself asleep in a dreamless state.  
  
  
_Dream sequence  
  
  
  
  
  
_There's blackness all around as I float. Its as if I've fallen into a black hole. "You have suffered much my child. Why continue your suffering." The voice is part male part female. as if speaking together. I hear it all around me yet I am not afraid. "I am paying my price." "How could any price be so high?" "I don't know." "You've seen and done so much." I say nothing. Suddenly an image appears infront of me. Its of Cusho taking care of me while I'm unconcious. "You've loved." The voice says. Another Image of me comforting Riuko appears. "You've been loved."   
Me glaring at Kagato. "You've hated." Me crying after Cusho died. "You've wept." Me with a look of anguishon my face as Cusho stuck me to the ground. "You've suffered." Me falling off the cliff."You've died." "Is there a reason for this?'Cause I don't see one." "There is a reason for everything." "Then why was I created only to die inside?" "Why is any other living thing created?" "I'm not living. I have no beating heart. A machine can't live." "Yet you have feelings. You feel hurt, joy, happiness, how can you call that not living?" "And _this _is?!"__Nothing else is said as I wake up.  
  
  
  
  
_end dream sequence  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_A blast rattles me awake. "Huh?! Whats going on?! Riuko!!" I get dressed and and fly out to the top of the building! The gundams are blasting Riuko and the base! Riuko dodges all of there attacks and retaliates with his own. "Riuko!!" I fly toward him to help! The fight wages on for hours on end. My suit is torn and bloody. I'm exhausted! I can carry on no more. I give up and plummet to the top of the base. When I hit I can see Wing Zero take aim at me and fire. I don't care anymore. I wait for the pain but it never came. Riuko teleports infront of me and blocks the attack with his back!! The look on his face is one I can never forget nor describe to anyone.  
When its finished he collapses into my arms. "Ri-sika my angel(pant)I wont let anyone take you a-away fr-fr-from ....me." With that he dies in my arms. I stare in mute horror as my other half dies in my bloody arms. I begin to shake yet not one tear falls. My eyes clench shut as I shake with rage. You've hurt me for the last time Heero. "I'LL MAKE YOU PAY!!!!" I scream with rage and sorrow in my voice.  
I take every fiber of power inside my body untill my gems explode in my wrists but I couldn't care less. I am now flying above wing zero and everyone is in to much shock to notice. A large energy ball containing my last ounce of life is held in my arms which are now raised above my head to strike. Tears begin to stream down my face but it doesn't affect my expression of pure hatred and rage. "You've hurt me for the last time you son of a bitch." I whisper before I bring my arms down destroying wing zero. and the man that destroyed my soul.  
I fall back down to the top of the base next to my partner. The gundam pilots, except Heero run to my side to help me. Yells of hang on and don't leave surround me. But I don't hear a word. I stare at Riuko's face. His eyes are closed and his shirt is ripped to nearly unrecognizable, blood surrounds him. So much blood. It seeps over and soaks my own body. Tears fall onto my body. They're crying for me. I reach over and for the last time I take Riuko's hand in my own. Where ever we go at least we'll be together. For all eternity. Just like it was meant to be.  
  
  
  
  
  
So now you know  
  
You've seeped into the mind of a monster  
  
You know the truth  
  
And you will tell no one  
  
For the secret will die with us  
  
You know something no one living does  
  
you know my bloody secret  
  
Keep it well   
  
Tell no one  
  
For it dies with you  
  
let it die with you  
  
Just as I had  
  
My beautiful bloody secret   
  
  
  
  
  
  
The end 


	4. Default Chapter Title

I hate writing the copywrite i hate writing the copy write i hate writing the copy write i hate righting the copywrite I HATE WRITING THE COPYWRITE! Its sooo annoying! N.E. wayz I don't want a lawsuit so people this may come as a shock 2 u but I don't own gundam wing, kagato, washu, or risika! **Since some body asked me to write a better ending I decided that I would grant that wish k?**  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_The Bloody Secret_  
  
  
  
  
  
Cusho lie there with his wrists sliced open. An eternity of blood surrounded him in a circle of death. In some morbid subconcious of mine this was beautiful. He looked so peacefull and the crimson framed his body like a death cloud. A wave of nausea passes over me and I run to through the remains of my non-existing lunch in a tree. I walk back over too him in mere shock. Finally the pure pain of what has just happend hits me like a freight train. My kneese give way as I collapse and clutch Cusho to my breast. His once beautiful eyes of gold were now hidden from the world forever.  
It hurt worse knowing he died hating me. It hurt worse knowing I never had a chance. It hurt worse knowing he didn't love me. I look at his beautiful face. My precious warrior. My love, my soul, my heart. You tamed the heartless monster that I share my body with. Now it is set free once more, but even it mourns your death. So we shall mourn together the monster and I. No. You shouldn't be found like this. You shouldn't have one of those normal funerals that humans find so damned important. I take you in my arms and leap from branch to branch. I should take him to the forest, that is were he saved me. NO! You died hating me. You shouldn't be barried in a place I'm sure you find so vile now.  
I take your souless body to lake Mayumi. The place where you first met your beloved Relena. She made you happy when I could not. She was pure. I was a monster. She was innocent. I was drowned in the blood of others. She was a princess. I was a barbarien. She was your love. I was not.............A sob racks my body as I know I am forced to let you go. The water chills my body as I dive into it. When I am half way to the bottom I look at your face. Your beautiful face that once held so many smiles. Tears drown me more than the water surrounding me does. I let you go and watch you as you fall into the abiss to once again join your beloved. And she is not me.  
I propell myself out of the water and leap to the highest tree branch to survey Lake Mayumi. "Don't worry Cusho. I will never violate your resting place with my bloody hands. I will never bother you again." With that I run away from that cursed place with the promise of no return. After hours of mindlessly wondering I find myself over looking the ocean. What was I going to do? I didn't want to go back. I didn't want to go back to the hidious monster Cusho so hated. I feel a presence behind me and whirl around. It is a fawn. One that has just found its spots. The young deer wanders up to me unafraid. Its ears twitch as it sniffs and licks my hand. Does it taste the blood that I know is there.  
I create an energy sword in my good hand. I want to kill something beautiful. I raise my arms, both hands clutching the sword as I look the newly born deer in the eyes. With a great force my weapon down and plunge it into the heart! But it wasn't the deer's. I stagger back still clutching the sword in my chest. The pain is almost unbearable. The fawn follows my staggers with worry in its eyes. I turn away from it and look out into the ocean. A smile passes my face as I step of the ledge of the cliff. Falling. Thats all I feel. And yet I'm happy. The last thing I see is the fawn looking down at me with pain in its eyes.  
I see it follow my movements and walk off the ledge. At least my last moments on this earth wont be alone. I'm so sorry Riuko.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_End Flash back  
  
  
  
  
_When I awake Riuko is gone. "Riuko?" I clutch the covers to my naked body and look around. He's no where to be seen. I get up and get back into my work gear.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_At Relena's/Risika's Mansion  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The words of the great Zechs Marquis could be heard all the way in Hawaii. "Just what we told you. A man named Kagato called her an android and left with her." The monotone voice belonging to Heero. "Psst Duo, get the sedative."Noin whispered. Duo nodded and went off to get some sedative and prozac. "So you're telling me my sister is the killer of trillions of people on colonies and earth!" Each of the gundam pilots nodded. She was a killer. That was all he could think of.  
She would destroy the newly built Sanqu Kingdom if he let her. "Kill her." He whispered. "WHAT!"you can bet that screech was from Duo. "If she lives She'll destroy the Sanqu Kingdom and the Peace we've worked so hard for." HE turned away as he said this. "If you're willing to kill your own sister then your no better than her!" Duo was ready to kill ths guy. "Mission accepted." Duo turned toward Heero."WHAAATT!!" Heero responded by walking out. The rest of the gundam pilots soon followed.  
  
  
  
  
_Outside the window of the office which they were in.  
  
  
  
  
_So thats the way he wants it. My own brother has betrayed me. My own brother thinks I'm a monster. I clench my eyes shut and my fists shake at my side as I balance myself on the sill. "You have no brother so I don't know why you're worried." I open my eyes and find Riuko floating laying down with his legs crossed and his hands behind his head. "Leave me Riuko!" "Why?" I have no answer. I jump and begin floating over to the top of the building. Washu designed the gems as the gundams. Using the power source which enables them to shoot lasers and the device with enables them to levetate.  
Riuko stands infront of me and stares down at me from my sitting position. "I don't understand why you're all worked up." "you wouldn't" "That never used to be the case." "Riu don't-" "Why?" "Things can't go back to the way they were." "Why?" "I've changed." "Why?" "I couldn't help it." "It was Cusho wasn't it." "He was the start. He changed the way I see things." "He made you blind. But now that you see with your eyes open you know that you were right all along." I saw nothing. "Everyone has betrayed you Sika-chan. Your new sight has only hurt you. Now its time to go back to the way things were." Is he right? was I blind all along?  
I nod and levetate to my feet. I don't like flying at all, it wastes far to much energy. We make our way home and begin to train for the fight.  
  
  
  
  
  
Hours later I find myself asleep in a dreamless state.  
  
  
_Dream sequence  
  
  
  
  
  
_There's blackness all around as I float. Its as if I've fallen into a black hole. "You have suffered much my child. Why continue your suffering." The voice is part male part female. as if speaking together. I hear it all around me yet I am not afraid. "I am paying my price." "How could any price be so high?" "I don't know." "You've seen and done so much." I say nothing. Suddenly an image appears infront of me. Its of Cusho taking care of me while I'm unconcious. "You've loved." The voice says. Another Image of me comforting Riuko appears. "You've been loved."   
Me glaring at Kagato. "You've hated." Me crying after Cusho died. "You've wept." Me with a look of anguishon my face as Cusho stuck me to the ground. "You've suffered." Me falling off the cliff."You've died." "Is there a reason for this?'Cause I don't see one." "There is a reason for everything." "Then why was I created only to die inside?" "Why is any other living thing created?" "I'm not living. I have no beating heart. A machine can't live." "Yet you have feelings. You feel hurt, joy, happiness, how can you call that not living?" "And _this _is?!"__Nothing else is said as I wake up.  
  
  
  
  
_end dream sequence  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_A blast rattles me awake. "Huh?! Whats going on?! Riuko!!" I get dressed and and fly out to the top of the building! The gundams are blasting Riuko and the base! Riuko dodges all of there attacks and retaliates with his own. "Riuko!!" I fly toward him to help! The fight wages on for hours on end. My suit is torn and bloody. I'm exhausted! I can carry on no more. I give up and plummet to the top of the base. When I hit I can see Wing Zero take aim at me and fire. I don't care anymore. I wait for the pain but it never came. Riuko teleports infront of me and blocks the attack with his back!! The look on his face is one I can never forget nor describe to anyone.  
When its finished he collapses into my arms. "Ri-sika my angel(pant)I wont let anyone take you a-away fr-fr-from ....me." With that he dies in my arms. I stare in mute horror as my other half dies in my bloody arms. I begin to shake yet not one tear falls. My eyes clench shut as I shake with rage. You've hurt me for the last time Heero. "I'LL MAKE YOU PAY!!!!" I scream with rage and sorrow in my voice.  
I take every fiber of power inside my body untill my gems explode in my wrists but I couldn't care less. I am now flying above wing zero and everyone is in to much shock to notice. A large energy ball containing my last ounce of life is held in my arms which are now raised above my head to strike. Tears begin to stream down my face but it doesn't affect my expression of pure hatred and rage. "You've hurt me for the last time you son of a bitch." I whisper before I bring my arms down destroying wing zero. and the man that destroyed my soul.  
I fall back down to the top of the base next to my partner. The gundam pilots, except Heero run to my side to help me. Yells of hang on and don't leave surround me. But I don't hear a word. I stare at Riuko's face. His eyes are closed and his shirt is ripped to nearly unrecognizable, blood surrounds him. So much blood. It seeps over and soaks my own body. Tears fall onto my body. They're crying for me. I reach over and for the last time I take Riuko's hand in my own. Where ever we go at least we'll be together. For all eternity. Just like it was meant to be.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The end? You wish  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_five years later  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_The battle has been one. All the pilots are at there respective colonies. We are at L5. Wufei sits at a bare sipping a martinii. Sunddenly a large hand slaps him on the shoulder. "Heeeyyy pal wazsh up? Did you's check out that chick at the counter? Real fiesty one!" The druken man slurrs. Wufei flips him over his shoulder and goes back to drinking his martinii. Unfortunately curiostiy over comes him and he looks toward the counter. Through the crow he makes out a streak of gold. Huh!? Wufei runs up to the counter pushing his way througha drunken crowd. When he reaches the the stool. She's gone. "Huh? Relena?"  
"You're losing it Wufei."He says to himself. Yet in the back of his mind he knows what he saw. "I think I've had enough." Wufei pays the bill and walks out of the bar. He shakes his head to get the thought out of his mind. He isn't paying attention to notice he's bumped into someone. "Oh excuse me sir." He opens his eyes and comes face to face with a pair of emerald ones. Then in an instant they're gone. Wufei whips around and looks everywhere around him. "Relena!" He runs in the opposite direction in which he was goind.  
But nothing's there. He growls. "Stop messing with my head witch!" Suddenly something catches his eye. A sandy gold tassle is steaming above a building. Wufei runs toward the building untill he reaches the fire escape and climbes up. When he reaches the top he searches all around. He growls something about sourceress messing with his mind and prepares to leave. "Jeeze took you long enough." He whirls around to the source of the voice. A young woman with long sandy blonde hair past her knees is laying side ways with her back facing him on the edge of the roof looking down at the people below.  
Wufei walks closer to her. "Relena?" "If you wish, yes." He snorted and looked her over for changes. She's wearing a pair of navey blue jeans with nike sneaker, a black tube top, and a white blazer with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. "So how long have you been alive?" She chuckles a little. "How long have _you_?" He growled at her. "I have no time for your little games onna!" "Who said I'm playing any?" "So what happened to you?" He watched as she rolled on her back and looked up at him. "Androids do lose energy and die. But we can also regenerate with the help of our gems." "But your gems exploded . You can't use them anymore." "Thats true, but Riuko died of force, not energy loss." Wufei stared in awe as he realized what she had done.  
"Y-you took _his _gems?" She once again chuckled. "No not the gems, just the energy to survive." He nodded and sat down with her. "So how's it feel to be human?" She rolled her eyes at him and sighed. "Just because I can't fly or create laser anmore doesn't mean I'm human. I still have the body structure of an android so don't push it." Now it was Wufei's turn to chuckle. "You going to try to live a normal life now?" Relena/Risika smirked at this. "Sure I guess. I got a job as a lawyer can you believe it?" "You always were good at condemning people, now you can do it for a living." She simply nodded at this.  
"I think I've found out what I want to know, Its late so I'll leave you now." She watched him walk down the fire escape but not untill he yelled over to her."Be good!" Relena simply smirked and once again took her side ways laying position as she had before Wufei came.  
  
  
  
_Relena's pov  
  
  
  
  
  
_I watch a young man walk out of his misstress's condoe. "Hmm so my prey finally decided to come out neh?" I smirk as I see my gems surface to my wrist and give a off a few energy sparks. The moon shines down on me once more. I quickly create an energy sword and let a sadistice smile trap my face as I view my prey. "Sorry Wu-chan, But I'm just too good at being bad." Besides, I need another secret in my heart. 


End file.
